Supporting a Friend or Family Member

When someone you care about is struggling, it's natural to want to fix things. But you don't need to have the right answers, and you're not responsible for "solving" someone else's mental health. What tends to help most is simpler than it feels.

What actually helps

• Listen without rushing to fix. Sometimes people need to be heard more than they need advice. "That sounds really hard" goes further than you'd think.
• Ask directly. Asking someone if they're having thoughts of suicide does not put the idea in their head or make things worse — it gives them permission to be honest with you.
• Keep it low-pressure. Regular small check-ins (a message, a walk, a cup of tea) are often easier for someone to accept than one big serious conversation.
• Encourage professional support, gently. You can suggest a GP visit or self-referral to NHS Talking Therapies without pushing — see our guide to getting support in the UK.

If you're worried about immediate safety

If someone tells you they're thinking about suicide or self-harm and you're worried about their immediate safety, stay with them if you can, and encourage them to call Samaritans (116 123) or 999 together with you. You do not have to manage this alone — helplines like Papyrus HOPELINE247 also take calls from people supporting someone else, not just from the person themselves.

Try this: Look after your own wellbeing too. Supporting someone through a difficult time is genuinely hard, and it's okay to also talk to someone — a friend, a helpline, or our community — about how it's affecting you.

What not to worry about

You don't need special training to support someone. You don't need to know exactly what to say. Showing up, listening, and helping them find professional support when they're ready is enough — you're not meant to replace that support yourself.